DYNAMIC INTERACTION NEGOTIATIONS
BEFORE BEGINNING THE PROCESS:
Practice the right to a problem: Begin the interaction by honoring the “right to a problem”. This means that if one person brings up an issue, the
other person has an obligation to take it seriously and must either be available immediately to discuss it, or must set a time to do so.
Stay grounded: When you are grounded you are able to give full attention to the
problem.
Be open to the other person’s perspective: It is important to remind yourself that your function in the process is to learn as much as possible about the other person’s point of view.
Practice active listening: Use reflective listening skills like paraphrasing, perception checks, and behavior checks.
THE PROCESS:
1. Presentation: The person who raised the issue presents it to the other. They have the floor until they feel that they have made their points and that others understand.
2. Response: The other person presents her/his viewpoint. They have the floor until they feel that they have made their points and that others understand.
3. Free Discussion: Continue the discussion until neither has more to share about the issue.
4. Clarification: One person clarifies the problem and summarizes the perspectives presented. The purpose of this step is to make sure that both parties clearly understand the problem. If all parties agree we move on.
5. Set a Goal: At this point you are attempting to be on the same side of the table. Form a common goal together that incorporates the different perspectives which you have shared.
6. Brainstorm: Generate ways to move from the situation towards the goal. It is helpful to create an “idea” list during this step. Include all ideas even those ideas that may seem far-fetched; often these ideas lead to an exceptionally creative solution.
7. Plan: Construct a plan based on pleasing both parties as much as possible.
8. Temperature Check: One person describes the problem, solution and plan. Then check in with one another. The question to each person is, “can you live with this?” If “yes”, go to step 11. If “no”, go to next step.
9. Amendments: The person with the objection states his/her issue. The couple then goes back to change the goal, plan, or proposal to meet that concern.
10. Summary: Temperature check again. If both parties agree then summarize the plan. Repeat amendments if needed.
11. Assign Responsibilities: decide who is doing what, when, in order to carry out the plan.
12. Assign Power: Develop options and consequences.
